Someone Has to Say It

It’s not easy keeping a clean conscience.  I know, you’re thinking “Just don’t tell lies!” or “Quit stealing urine sample cups from the doctor’s office!”.  It’s not that simple.  Sometimes doing the right thing means that YOU have to be the one to tell someone something that no one else has the gamecock* to say.  And in so doing it happens often that you become known as the jerk that pointed it out.

But really, I ask you, how many times can you catch a whiff of someone’s rancid body odor before you say something?  Especially if it’s someone you see on a daily basis who is just simply lacking personal hygiene skills.  Like in a work setting.  If your desk or cubicle is next to Captain Stinkpits then you have to make a choice.  Either say something or live with it.  And I personally could not just live with it.  The smell of B.O. is right up there with the stale cat pee smell.  You can’t ignore it, you can’t cover it up with spray or air freshener.  It’s going to penetrate every one of your defenses until you get rid of its source.

How does this person NOT smell themselves?  And they think you’re the jerk for pointing it out? 

Speaking of jerk, sometimes keeping a clean conscience means letting someone know when THEY are being a jerk.  Like when two of your friends are in a heated disagreement and one of them is arguing a point that’s just wrong.  Like saying that socks and underwear go in the bottom drawer of the dresser.

And it’s not limited to just your friends.  Sometimes a complete stranger needs to be made aware of something that will make them uncomfortable.
 Now it may be tempting to keep your mouth shut and let the entire world know that the grown woman is wearing rainbow underwear but you don’t want that on your conscience.  Ethical dilemma aside, if you don’t say something then the cosmos may very well decide to burden you with the same affliction the next time you leave a public washroom.  But you may not be wearing any underwear at all!

Perhaps worse than the underwear mishap is the people who were never taught how to wear makeup and as such tend to pack it on like they are the love child of The Ultimate Warrior and Cyndi Lauper.  Young girls tend to make this mistake.  They are also excused because they are young girls and as such are still learning application techniques and what works and doesn’t work.  But the thirty year olds you see in line at the grocery store?
There’s really no way to tell how the person is going to take your opinion.  Either they will laugh and say they are wearing it because they lost a bet or are an eighties pop sensation, or they are going to get really huffy and tell you that your roots are showing.

Once place that nearly always requires me to speak up is at the gas station.  You wouldn’t believe how many times people get into their cars and leave either their gas caps open or their cups on the roof of their cars.  The best one though is when someone gets their receipt, gets into their car, and starts the engine, all the while oblivious to the fact that they haven’t taken the nozzle out of their tank yet.  Speaking up in this situation is more a matter of self-preservation than doing good for the populace.  I don’t want to know what will happen if the person drives off and pulls the nozzle right off of the pump.

Not everyone would feel obligated to say something in these situations.  In fact, I can think of several people right now who would sit back and snicker at the other’s expense.  I won’t name names…

*I was trying to find a term to replace “has the balls” and gave me “gamecock”.  It didn’t seem to fit but I’ll never turn down a chance to use the word “gamecock”.
A Gamecock 
(Artist's Rendition)

1 comment

  1. Your drawings crack me up!
    I love finding words to replace commonly used words.
    ...adding gamecock to my word list...